She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
