make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize