Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
