please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
you win again, gameday.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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