she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
