Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
