On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
