sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I just found puke in my bra..
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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