Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
