I have demons in me.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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