my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
