They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
