I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
