in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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