I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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