I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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