so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
