I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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