Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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