so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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