Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Randomize
