i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
