I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
