I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Swine flu is the new snow day.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
