It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
