I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
