...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
My bed smells like the plague
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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