Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
