I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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