fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize