Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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