i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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