they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
