So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
