jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
