Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Acid is not a monday night drug
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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