oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
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