The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
he puts the penis in happiness.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
