gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Randomize
