I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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