Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
