new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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