please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
