Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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