Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
