friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
