Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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