Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
