She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
