someone get that fucking seahorse.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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